Today I started packing.  Strange... for two reasons, mostly because that means I am leaving soon and also because I NEVER pack until the very last moment... ever.  I am pretty sick right now, the mosquitoes here decided to bless me with one last malaria experience before I head home and I also have some sort of respiratory infection which gives me the pleasure of spending my last days here in africa making back and forth trips to the hospital for injections... yikes.  I thought it might be wise to use this time to start organizing my things and things just slowly started making it into my pack.  Strange.  All of this is so strange.  Since the beginning we have talked a lot about what it would be like to leave... and now here it is... just a matter of a few days and I will be on my way.

I wanted to give you an idea of my schedule for the next little bit... once we start traveling I wont really have a way to get in touch (unless I run into some WIFI somewhere in the travels) and even when I get home I still wont have a phone or anything like that... I guess what I am saying is you should be expecting me to just be showing up at your house, I mean that is mostly what we do here in Africa anyway... is just show up.  Its my way of bringing a little of the culture here home to you! "Surprise! Can you hang out... well... Now?"

Sunday May 9:            We leave True Vine and head to Jinja, Uganda

Monday May 10:        Our flight leaves Entebbe at 4pm

Tuesday May 11:        Arrive in Huston, TX

May 11-15:                  Debrief with all of the Novas Project teams

May 15-20:                  Visiting Bryan in Kentucky

Thursday May 20:       ARRIVE IN HUNTINGTON BEACH!! @ 7:30 and going straight from the airport to Wahoos with my family!! And I will be eating chips and salsa... Amen? Amen.     

May 20-June 4:           Just hanging out around HB and the areas within biking distance

from there.

Memorial Day:            Sonshine Ministries all staff training weekend at the Delta

June 4:                         Leave for Lake Shasta!

Sometime in August:  I will return home once again...

I am really looking forward to heading up to the lake but it just doesn't leave much time in Huntington before leaving once again.  I am really looking forward to spending time with everyone so hopefully you are around!

So this blog is a little bit late coming... but I have been trying to come up with the words that would best describe why meeting Elizabeth was such a special thing... then I realized that the words probably would never come in a way that would be able to fully express it so I thought I would just go for it now...

Lets rewind to when my dad was here... while still living in Kenya my dad and Kirk were insisting that I would come back to Uganda when the Hope 4 Kids staff would be here in early April.  I said that there was no way that it could happen and that I would just have to meet them some other time.  But dad still had hope that I would meet him. 

When I first heard that I was going to be coming back to Uganda I called my dad and was telling him about it.  One of his first questions was wondering when I would be there because I might get there in time to meet Tom, Angie and Elizabeth.  But no, the dates just weren't lining up.  The night I was stuck in the bus traveling for 29 hours I was talking to my dad again and he was telling me I should call Tom, the founder of Hope 4 Kids, because he was stuck at the airport due of the Volcano and might be able to help somehow. They were supposed to be flying out the day that we were arriving.  The next day here at True Vine I was told that since they were unable to fly out that they were going to bring the team back to Torroro for another week to wait for a flight.  

This may seem silly but this was very exciting news.  I had been wanting to meet these people for a while now and had been hearing over and over again about how I NEEDED to meet this Elizabeth.  I couldn't help but wonder if this was another one of those ‘prayer accidents' that Pastor Wilber talks about... and was wondering if my dad would ever have to explain to Tom,‘oh I prayed that my daughter would meet you so woops there was a volcano and now she gets to meet you...sorry you were delayed in Africa but this was important' (I know its not really an ‘accident' but its just a funny concept that Pastor jokes about a lot here and that I quite enjoy the thought of.)

So Elizabeth.  She runs the orphan department for Hope 4 Kids and you only have to be around her for a moment to see what a calling she has for this... God made her to love on children.  I met her first at the hotel and was greeted with a big hug and a warm smile... and the next day she invited us to all come out and play some games with the kids here at True Vine.  There were kids everywhere and she is going around calling them by name and telling me who is who and they all know her as well.  As I was running around playing with ‘The Amazing Flying Ring' (Thanks Kirk!) I could look over and see kids surrounding her and noticed the time that she took to SEE each one.  Through out the next couple of days any chance I got to be around her I would take... and every time I was around her I was so inspired by her heart and the way that she serves God with the best of her gifts.  (And plus she is just a blast to be around!)

Living in this small community of 12 18-24 year olds has been hard for me in only one aspect... at home I have the opportunity to spend time with lots of women who are older than I am.  I think about the special time I have gotten to spend with my mom and my grandmas and my aunts and older cousins and Karen and Patti and Jennie.  On this trip I have really missed spending time with women that I can really look up to who are at the next point in life and are able to speak into the place that I currently find myself in. At home I do not think I have just one person specifically ‘discipling' me... for reasons I will never know I have been much more blessed than that... I have had so many women at home take time to ‘disciple' me and teach me how to be a women after Gods heart and for that I am so very thankful.  But here in Africa I have been going through withdrawals or something...haha... and often think back to time spent learning about hospitality and loving through time with Karen or about Gods heart and his beauty through time with Patti and about the value of prayer and seeking God daily through time spent with Jennie... and on and on and on.

Meeting Elizabeth was a great encouragement to my spirit; to have special time with a woman that I could really look up to and learn from and be encouraged by could not have come at a more meaningful time.  In the few conversations I had with her I was greatly encouraged.  One of the first chances I had to talk with her we were out playing with some kids and she was talking to me about school and following dreams and about leadership.  She encouraged me to follow my dreams and encouraged my heart in the ways that being a leader sometimes makes it tired.  Both perfect timing, for later that week I found out that I did not get into the school that I was hoping to go to... but I know that God had sent Elizabeth before that news in order to speak the courage into me that I would need to step up and look at what dreams God has been planting in my heart that I would want to go after following, and that a call to leadership is not dependent on school at all. Its amazing how God takes us through seasons without the things that are important to us (like maybe in this case discipleship) but he is so faithful to bring it back in the moments that it is most needed... even if that means a volcano erupting and keeping a whole team on this side of the world for a few extra days.

It has been sometime since Elizabeth has come and gone but I can honestly say that the encouragement that she offered and spoke into me has been thought of each day since she has left. 

Discipleship is so important... and even small moments of walking in it can have a major impact.  Thanks Elizabeth. 

When my dad came here to Africa he brought with him a letter from my friend Emma. Emma is one of the most lovely women that I have ever had the pleasure to be in relationship with. She loves Jesus from the deepest part of her heart... and you only have to be around her for a moment to know the sincerity and the dedication that she loves her Jesus with. Philippians 4:8 says:

"Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things."

This is Emma's heart. Ever since I have known here she has talked about longing for heaven and wanting to be ‘In love himself'. In the letter she wrote to me it said this "...and it makes me homesick for heaven. I feel like you ache and long like I do and the aching and longing is never fun. I feel it is the most beautiful thing we can long for." I remember reading this and feeling that I wish I could say that it was true of my heart too, but I wasn't sure if I was looking to heaven in the same way that she described. I have read this letter several times since it was passed off to me, and have really thought a lot about this... about longing for heaven. 

            When I was 12 years old there was all the talk of the world ending because of Y2K. I remember hearing about so and so who thought that it was going to be the end and then so and so who thought the whole thing was a joke. I was so confused by all of it and I remember it really scared me. I still to this day am not sure why the world ending was ever in question during that time but I remember lying in bed at night praying that it wouldn't. I didn't want it to end... I remember asking God if he could just wait until I was older, until after I had gone to high school and after I had gotten married and had some kids. My twelve year old heart had its eyes only on this life. The New Year came and I was so relieved that life seemed as it was going to continue on. I think that for the last 10 years my heart has stayed in a similar place... wanting to live this life, loving God but not understanding what it looked like to look forward to what is coming. In these years I have fallen in love with Jesus and have come to know him in new and amazing ways... but there remained apart of me that wanted to hold onto the things of this world. 

            This trip something has been changing in me, and this week I was able to identify what my heart has been feeling all along. Here in Africa I have been exposed to a new kind of brokenness that I have not before seen. I don't think that Africa is more broken than America, just broken in a different way, but here they don't try to hide it the way we do in America. Living here you have no choice but to look it square in the eyes and over the last months it has torn me up. I have often found myself seeing things, getting upset and wondering, ‘Ok, God what the heck?' It was hard for my heart to understand why things have to be the way that they are and why can't it just be different. Why do kids have to be hungry and why are there little boys and girls growing up with out dads and moms? Why are there young women mourning the loss of their husbands and having to choose a life of prostitution in order to feed her 4 children? Why are old women left in houses that are falling apart being rained on as their bodies grow weak, and why has the love of Christ been removed from so many churches and replaced with religion? How has jealousy and greed and competitiveness come to divide so many in the body of Christ... why are we not living as one? Its questions like this that keep me awake at night... they are almost constantly on my mind... and I think about what it would look like to live with out these things. My heart is not ok with the way things are.

            I have been having a really hard time sleeping, I lie down exhausted but my hearts brokenness wont allow my mind to slow down long enough to actually fall asleep. The other night I was too tired to even try to fight myself to sleep so after lying in bed for a while I went into the living room with my bible and turned on my music and just worshipped and spent time processing through journaling... and like I said... God showed up. 

            That night God showed me that what my heart was yearning for was in fact heaven. That the things that I see and that are just not right in my spirit... those are the things that God is in the process of reconciling back to him. He is not ok with these things too... and he is in the process of bringing it all back and will not relent until it is finished.

            As followers of Christ God has invited us to be apart of this process of reconciliation:

2^nd Corinthians 5:1-2, 8, 18-20

"For we know that if the tent, which is our earthly home, is destroyed, we have a building from God, a house not made with hands, eternal in the heavens. For in this tent we groan longing to put on our heavenly dwelling, if indeed by putting it on we may not be found naked... Yes, we are of good courage, and we would rather be away from the body and at home with the Lord. So whether we are at home or away, we make it our aim to please him... All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation. Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, God making his appeal through us."

God is at work bringing his kingdom to completion here on earth. One day all things will be reconciled to him. It says in Revelation 21:3-5 talking about the new heaven and the new earth:

"Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be his people, and God himself will be with them as their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning nor crying nor pain anymore for the former things have passed away. And he who was seated on the throne said, ‘Behold, I am making all things new.'"

That night God revealed to me that Heaven is what he has been writing on my heart here in Africa. I think that he brought me here to show me that this world isn't enough, that this world is so very broken... The best way I can explain it is he has brought me here to SEE this world in a different way and in this he has lifted my eyes up to see him and see his plan of making all things new.   He brought me here to invite me in a whole new way to partner with him in reconciliation. 

It's been quite the process... In Mexico we talked a lot about how Jesus was here on earth and he showed us what we are to do and what it looks like to really follow after him. During our time here God has shown me over and over that he is with me here now. I have gone back to Isaiah 30:19-21 more times than I could even count and through it he has been covering me in the truth that my Teacher hears me and he answers me and shows me which way to go. And now here at the end of my trip he has written Heaven on my heart... God's kingdom coming. He was here, he is here now and he is coming. This morning while spending time with the Father, he was reminding me of these things that he has taught me and showing me the complete message that he has been leading me to. God speaks.

I think now I can actually say, "Yes Emma... I do long for Heaven." God has shown me and my heart will no longer be satisfied in anything except to be In Love Himself. 

(One side note... I was sharing this blog with Jess and she was talking to me about the whole decision I made to step out in trusting God during this season... if you don't know what I am referencing I talk about it in the blog "Trust is an Action". I thought God was wanting me to step in this trust to show me something completely different... but now I can see that he wanted me to step away from anything that I am attached to here on this earth so that he could bring me to this place of allowing God room to write Heaven on my heart. God is really cool. I knew he had something to say. AND I am really excited because I have been praying and praying asking God to show me the message he would have me to share during my three weeks with Team Barnabas this summer... and there it is, 1- He was here, 2- He is here now, and 3- He is coming. It's really cool to see the way God brings everything back together.)

After devotions our team ate some breakfast and then headed off to Smile Africa. Smile Africa is a place that tons and tons of kids come to just be. The kids that come are the kids that don't have anywhere else to go, many orphans, many street kids, many kids that come from families with just not enough to provide for them, each kid arrives to Smile with a story, and usually a complicated one. Here they are provided meals and it serves simply as a safe place to come and be. When ever the bus pulls in to Smile Africa kids start running... they grab your hands as you step off the bus... and I say ‘they' grab your hands because there is usually a couple kids holding onto each hand and then some hanging onto your arm and then three or so walking right in front of you trying to get a hold of your hand or arm if anyone moves theirs for even a moment. Spending time at Smile is one of my favorite things to do. The kids just want to play with you... and it just so happens that I really love to play. If you don't engage them in some sort of activity then you end up sitting somewhere with about 10 kids on top of you and all around you, touching your face and petting your arm hair and pulling on your necklaces (the kids usually try to rub my tattoo off... and look at their hand to see if anything was removed). I tend to get a little bit claustrophobic in that situation so I try to think of as many interactive games that involve lots of kids that I can during the hours that we are there. I have made friends with a couple of the older girls and I love hanging with them...

They have been teaching me some of those hand games... you know... like the ones all the girls in the 4^th grade know how to play. The games that are some sort of combination between a secret hand shake and umpire gestures and clapping that all come together as we sing some song that goes with a certain combination of all this. There was one game that was so fun... a group of us would stand in a circle and do the little clap hand routine and sing the song that progressively got faster and faster until the song would say "again again statue, again again statue" and then everyone would FREEZE right where they were and stay frozen until someone laughs. I like this game because one... I have a little bit of space. I love the kids... but having 12 of them touching me at once just makes me thankful for moments like this where I, well, don't. The second reason was because when ever we froze if I could land in a pose that allowed me to keep eye contact with one of the girls it was just a matter of time before they would laugh, turns out that when you are a whitey you don't have to do a ‘funny' pose at all, its funny enough to be white and to me that was very amusing. I really enjoy the time I get to spend with these girls just laughing and playing games... and well... loving.  

I have spent time with the same girls the last couple of times there now... and I am looking forward to spending some more good time with them in the next couple of weeks. One thing that I have really missed on this trip (with all the moving around and different out reach weeks) has been having time to be apart of the same thing long enough to build relationships. It has been really wonderful to be in one place where we really can dive in with the time we have and get to be apart of ministries repeatedly. 

The rest of the day included ICE CREAM! (thanks Robert!!) yes, ice cream, driving Pastor Johns car all across town (I have only driven one other time since in Africa in Paul's Land Rover and I really like driving so it was quite a welcomed surprise to hear Pastor John say "Come, you drive" as I was getting in the car!), going into the bush bush to a church service that meets in the shade of a small brick building under a tree, being gifted with a bag of popcorn seeds and two chickens, and me (the vegetarian) getting to carry the live chicken back to the car surrounded by a line of kids laughing and saying "CHICKEN CHICKEN..." and getting to drive back home with the chickens in the back... haha. Chickens.

I bet you could guess what Frank is out back cooking right at this very moment...

The other day I had the privilege of joining up with some of the Hope 4 Kids team heading out to Sigulu Island.  It's a long drive to get to the boat and a long boat ride to get to the island and then a long walk to get to the church.  I loved it.  It's a pretty untouched place... simple and filled with breathtaking beauty. 

With all the travels out to the island I had a lot of ‘thinking' time, I turned my Ipod on and picked through some of my favorite songs as I watched Africa pass by.  It was one of those surreal moments.  We were driving down roads that for the most part I have traveled many many times, from Torroro to Busia, my old neighborhood.  But it all seemed different.  I was listening to a mess of sappy love songs and a lot of Mason Jennings, but the ‘love' that kept coming to mind as the words played on was Africa.  Mason Jennings ‘Be Here Now' came on and I probably listened to it about 7 times in a row before moving onto anything else.  You know those moments when a song sings everything that you are thinking? Well that was happening but I was still thinking when the song ended so I had to just keep playing it again. 

The song says this:

"Be here now"

Like I was saying before, I was looking out and SEEING Africa.  It was right there.  It wont always be right out side of my car window.  In just 2 weeks time I wont be able to see it there.  There was so much to see that I decided to focus in and notice all of the trees.  The trees here are incredible.  Huge, Crooked, Old, Wonderful Trees. I was wishing there was time to stop and climb each one, to sit in the shade that it was offering to everyone passing by.  Trees are just so hospitable in that way... so inviting.  I wanted to take time to accept each invitation, but instead was able to catch a glimps of their beauty.

"No other place to be

Oh just sit there dreaming of how life could be

If we were somewhere better,

somewhere far,

away from all our worries,

well here we are"

I remember the planning process of coming here.  The talking and the dreaming of what it would be like to be in Africa.  "Well here we are".  I have been blessed beyond blessed to spend this time here. The last few weeks have been hard because knowing I am coming home so soon makes it hard to not start thinking about and preparing for the next thing... but again... Be here now. I don't think that there could be a better place, no matter how far I went.

"You are the love of my life"

The thought of leaving is nothing short of heartbreaking. I was thinking about the people I have met here, the things I have seen... I have been going around through out this time in Africa passing out these pieces of my heart.  Paying for each moment, some more costly than others, but all taking their share... a piece left with Magdalina and Rail, a piece with Paul and his family, a piece with Jared and one with Judy and Steve, each one of the New Hope girls hold a part and Momma Tom, each baby that I held in my arms and each child that sat on my lap, each widow that we spent time visiting, each long drive, each sunset, each long walk down the dirt roads... and on and on.  It all cost something... a cost I am willing to pay.  The moment ends and my heart stays there with them.  I had a terrifying moment thinking about going home... how will I go on if I am leaving all of my heart here?  I could picture myself finally back in my room at home, sitting down in the middle of the floor (I love sitting on the floor... I prefer it over a chair most the time and I am looking forward to sitting on a floor with CARPET... amen) but I couldn't imagine myself able to leave that spot, how can I take one more step with such a broken heart?  The other day I almost became afraid of meeting anyone else new... afraid of the heart ache it would cause to fall in love with even one more person, to give even one more piece of my heart away, and then quickly say goodbye.  I cant help but feel like I am running out of pieces. I thought this and then went outside to play with some kids and decided that they could have the last pieces if they wanted it... it was worth it for a few more precious moments with them. 

"Be here now

No other place to be

All the doubts that linger just set them free,

and let good things happen

and let the future come, into each moment like a rising sun"

I have a lot of questions about what the future is holding.  I wish there was a way to look ahead and to know if this is a ‘goodbye' or just a ‘see you soon'.  The future is on its way.  Soon I will be back in America.  Soon I will be living again on a houseboat and spending my days in a little fishing boat called ‘Skiffy II' (still don't know what happened to the first one...) Soon the summer will end and God will take me to the next place.  I just found out that what I had planned on doing next is no longer an option... What now? Today I am in Africa.  Thank God that today I am in Africa.

"You are the love of my life

You are the love of my life

Ya you know you are"

I don't want to leave.  I don't want to leave.  Africa is my love. Africa has completely stolen my heart... In the bus, ‘accidentally' missing my flight seemed like an idea absolutely worth considering.  If I didn't have such a short time before leaving again I might not have ruled it out to be honest.  Even right now as I write this it doesn't seem like a bad idea.  I love it here and just wish that I could spend time seeing and living more.  I don't want to leave.

"The sun comes up and we start again

The sun comes up and we start again"

Time.  Time feels like it is completely against me... slowly leading me towards leaving.  I am trying to slow it down... I don't even like hanging out in the house we are staying in at True Vine... I have to be out side... out in Africa. SLOW DOWN. slow down. please. Please don't make me leave yet.

"Its all new today,

all we have to say, is be here now"

14 days.  Each one filled with something new.  14 more wonderful days.  14 more days that I get to be here.

"Be here now

No other place to be

This whole world keeps changing

Come change with me"

Sometimes I feel like I just get settled into where I am in life and then its time to go.  Always changing always moving forward.  I have changed a lot on this trip.  Recently I have tried to really take a look at who I am.  Thinking about where I want to grow, what I like and don't like, what I am passionate about, who I want to become.  It feels like it is all changing so fast I cant keep up.  I have had the pleasure of walking this out with a team, we have changed a lot together... I move back to an old community then on to a new one shortly after that when I get home.  I have been really learning about trusting God and looking to him to be my constant.  He is always there... always walking with me in those changes... he knows me even when I am unsure of it myself. 

"Everything that happens, all that's yet to come

Is inside this moment it's the only one"

I have been looking at the life of Joseph... he had a lot of ups and downs but he never gave up, he was always present and available to be used by God not matter what moment he was in.  God was with him in each up and each down and God used each one to bring about a plan much bigger than what Joseph could see.  There is a lot that is ‘yet to come'... I am 22 and really just beginning.  These moments are the moments that God has me in now.  These moments are the moments that he is using to lead me to what is ‘yet to come'. 

"You are the love of my life

Ya you know you are"

There was a park that I used to go to when I was a kid... Dragon Park.  It was kinda far away so every once in a while my mom and a couple of her sisters would take me and my cousins there... we would go all afternoon.  It was closed in with a gate so my mom and aunts would set up somewhere and we would get to just GO.  I remember that park felt so big.  I wouldn't use the path... me and my cousins would climb through bushes and find whole new sections of the park and get lost.  I remember sitting on top of this cement thing (I still don't know what it was) and looking out on the park.  Trees everywhere.  Places to explore.  The feeling of walking and coming across huge dragon slides.  I would think about hiding so that I wouldn't have to leave.  I love Africa like I loved the Dragon Park when I was a kid.  I went back to the park for Gavin's birthday party sometime back.  Turns out its not that far away, and its not all that big or hard to get around.  It was still very special to me... but it was accessible.  Africa may be ‘far away' to some... but to me it is not... it has become accessible.  I will be back... I have to be back.

"The sun comes up and we start again

The sun comes up and we start again"

I don't know where I am going.  But I know what I am doing today. I am living this day.

"Its all new today, all we have to say is be here now"

              There is a man that works here at True Vine... his name is Francis, but if you were to be introduced to him that is not what he would say... instead he would hold up his True Vine name tag and point right under his name where it reads "Water Man".  "I am Water Man" he would say. Water Man is a hard worker. All day long he is going around and working on something... most likely water related. No matter how many times in a day that you pass him by he will always stop what he is doing with a big ol grin across his face to shake your hand and say hello and to ask how you are. I love this man. 

            During our time here we were asked to break our selves up into a couple of smaller groups and to join in with the different departments morning devotional time. I am in the group that meets in the main office with the staff that works in there. It's a handful of us each morning, worshiping and praying and sharing a devotional with one another. During that time we are in the office each morning Water Man comes into mop the office floors. He stops what he is doing and takes off his hat when we pray and you hear him mumbling "Amens" through out the devotional time as he quietly goes about his work. 

            The other morning I was headed into the office and I found Water Man in the little entryway room before you make it into the main office. I stopped for a minute to say good morning to him and like he always does he smiled and smiled, took my hand and did a little bow like thing. He asked how I was and I told him I was fine and he just kept smiling but then he kissed my hand and said "God really loves us". With that he smiled, let go of my hand, and went back to work. 

            During all of devotions that morning that moment kept running through my head. Water Man had it... Yes. God really does love us. What else do I need to even say?

            I can see that Water Man really loves God too. I see it in the way that he works and the way that he stops to really SEE people. In that moment in the office I wasn't really seeing Water Man at all... his humility makes him transparent and Christ shines straight through that man. I experience a deep love in the moments that I am around this very special old man... and I know that it is Gods love that flows through him.

            Thank you God for Water Man and his reminder that... Yes, you really love us.

So before we took our 29 hour bus travels across Kenya and into Uganda.  We had to take a matatu from our apartment to the bus station in down town Mombasa.  The matatu's stop and go and there is a conductor that is yelling from the window trying to collect more people and more and more people pile into this van as it stops and goes and stops and goes over bumps and swerving all over the road.  14 passenger vans carrying well over 14 people and with loud music playing... I will say these are not always my favorite of ways to travel. 

We walked out to the road... there were nine of us and its hard to fit us all into one van.  We thought about splitting up but out of the group I was the only one who really knew how to get where we needed to be so we were all a little hesitant to split up.  Its dark and matatus are stopping and going trying to see if they can talk us into their van but none can fit us all.  This empty van drives by... I jam over to the window to ask him if he was going to town.  He asked me how many and said ok 100 shillings each. 

Let me take a quick moment and say this... I don't like getting ripped off.  I usually would rather just wait for a fair price than pay double what I should... which is a daily battle here in Africa with my white skin screaming to everyone around me that I have money.  (If they could only see my bank account their thoughts my be changed slightly...)

"No, its 50 shillings to town." Usually, a back and forth would begin here trying to find a fair price but I know that this is how much it should cost for us and I just cant afford to pay more. 

"Ok, just get in." Really? That easy? Ok... we all climb in the car and he starts driving.  The music is turned down low (and is actually African worship music) and the van doesn't stop.  It just keeps steadily going forward.  He doesn't drive to fast and I don't have fear that I am about to get in a car accident at any moment.  This ride in the van is WONDERFUL!

Turns out that the man, Philip, wasn't even working when I had walked up to his window.  He hadn't been working all day.  He asked us what we were doing and started talking about being missionaries or whatnot and he got so excited and started telling us how he is a missionary too! That he loves God. 

The matatus usually just take you on their route and you hit the roof when you are ready to have the van stop.  We were planning on getting into town and getting in one of these smaller taxis and having them take us to the other side of town to where the bus place was.  Philip, as he was driving us along, asked us where we were going.  "We are headed to the Akamba." "I will take you there." What? Right there... really? A small thing but a HUGE blessing.  The place where the matatus usually go is just not the best part of town and I wasn't looking forward as a group of nine whities to be dropped off into a part of town that I would rather not be in at all.  His offer to take us right to the Akamba bus station was a huge burden removed. 

As we were driving through town, maybe a 20 or 30 minute drive, I was remembering a time when I was little. My Mom and my Aunts brought all the girl cousins to Chicago for a getaway.  I remember walking through town and this empty bus stopped and offered to take us all where we needed to go.  Because the man wasn't ‘working' at the moment he didn't take fares from us but as we were getting out of the bus and saying our thank you's he told us to ‘pay it forward'.  He had blessed us with the only request to go and bless someone else. 

This whole van ride wasn't a big deal in and of its self... but it really spoke to me. 

I feel like this man showed us love before he even knew who we were.  He protected us and took care of us... he stopped going where he was going to take us where we needed to be.  I was so blessed by Philip.  I feel like God brought Philip right to us that night while we stood on the side of that road.  I love that God takes care of even the smallest of details... and that he cares enough to bring someone along side us to take us right where we need to be. 

I was blessed by Philip and hope that the same as I was once encouraged in the streets of Chicago that I can pay this one forward.