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More Jesus.

The other day, during outreach in
Sindo, I came back from door to door ministry a little upset.  Door to door ministry is hard for me because
I really believe in the “befriend, encourage, model, challenge” ministry philosophy
I work under at camp during the summer… where relationship with those we
minister to is of the highest priority. 
Its hard to know how to work in that in the midst of visiting a family
for forty five minutes… and also so humbling to see the way that the people
just welcome us into their home as their guest and drop anything they are doing
to spend time with us.  (I guess that this
is the first area I really need more Jesus… to trust that he is able) Anyway,
we had met this woman, Rose, the mother of 6 children, and were talking with
her for a while before her husband came. 
He too was excited to have ‘visitors’, for they both said they follow
Jesus, and he sat right down to listen to what we were sharing with his wife.  We prayed with them and followed the husband
as he led us out of the house to a neighboring house where we met Margaret and
her two children.  The man sat down and
one of the little boys went right up and was hugging and just wanting his
attention.  I looked puzzled at Pastor
Samuel, our translator/friend from Mbita, who also was a little confused.  He asked and was told by the man that this is
his newest wife – his forth.  We visited
there for a while and then he sent us to visit his first wife who was working
in a small field.  I asked Samuel if we
could go help her- I had seen an extra plow on the path and went back to grab it.   Joyce, the first wife of the man,
taught KC and myself the best way to go about weeding the field and the
difference between all the plants growing in the field.  Her husband came and when we had finished we
again got to share with her and pray with her before heading home.

            This wasn’t
the first time we have seen or encountered polygamy since we have been
here.  Its actually VERY common in Kenya, and
we have even recently met this American girl, Danielle, who is planning on
marrying a Massai warrior as his second wife. 
But for what ever reason this time just really unsettled me.  I asked Pastor if we could talk about it
before going to lunch and Pastor, KC, and myself sat down but were quickly joined
by many more and the conversation was hijacked and taken somewhere completely
else.  I sat there just so frustrated and
really needing to debrief.  I couldn’t
understand what was right here.   Of the
women we had met two knew Jesus and the third accepted him while with us and
the husband knows him as well.  As I sat
there I just kept thinking its so clear one husband one wife, these women need
to leave but then I was picturing that little boy of the 4th wife,
Margaret, who eagerly went to his father and fell asleep in his arms and how he
needs a dad.  There are already too many
children with out their parents and where else can these women really go?

            Time for
lunch- most of the people left to go inside but me and Pastor and maybe 2
others just remained in our chairs.  He
told me about how the parents of these girls will encourage them to marry
anyone who is willing to pay.  He told me
what he thought should happen if a polygamous family came to know the Lord but
he told me how even as a pastor he didn’t know how to lead his people in this
and wanted to know my opinion on what should be done. 

            “How am I
suppose to know” is all that I could even think, these problems we see just
seem so big and so complicated.  But as
we talked and I was able to think a little bit more it became so clear and it
just started pouring out of my mouth… all these problems come from the same
root and that root is simple… We need more Jesus.

            I believe
that if these women truly understood the value that God sees them with and the
incredible love he has for them they wouldn’t accept to become a 4th
wife.  They would know that their
bridegroom sees only them.  I believe
that if the parents of these women really saw their children as God sees us
that they wouldn’t be desperate to have their daughters married off to receive
the dowry.  I believe that if the men
here really understood the role that they are called into as sons of the King
that they would be satisfied to leave behind the pursuit of power and wealth to
store up instead treasure in heaven.

More Jesus.

Within my team I have recently been hearing stupid
complaints about things like how many times their name showed up on the dishes
schedule to I don’t want to speak because I don’t like it…

We need more Jesus.

If we understood the humility and life of servant hood that
Jesus took on and really sought to model our life after him wouldn’t we all be
offering to do someting as simple as the dishes with joy and wouldn’t we
celebrate the opportunity to talk about the love that our savior poured our for
us while we were still sinners on the cross speaking with joy and not settling
in our fear or discomfort.

We need more Jesus.

When I’m frustrated with the team I need to understand the
grace that he constantly extends to me and extend that to others. 

I need more Jesus. 

When I’m frustrated with the mode of ministry I am asked to
work under I need to understand Gods power to move and my call to obedience and
love.

I need more Jesus.

And when I come home feeling defeated and confused from
ministry I need to understand Gods heart for his people and to see that he
hurts too and that its not ok and that’s why he sent Jesus.

He knew how much we would need Jesus.

I cried as I wrote in my journal sitting next to T as she
was trying to figure out “Lord I Lift Your Name on High” on the guitar. We had
our backs leaned up against a mud hut right under this mountain in a small
African village called Sindo.  I haven’t
cried really at all since I have been in Africa but I couldn’t hold back my
tears any longer, the problem is simple but complicated and overwhelming all at
once.

We all need more Jesus.